#all the time and i hate this so much and i hate being a burden to the person i love

[yandere-kokeshi]

Hi can you write headcanons With Nikolai , Alex , Farah , Ale and rudy with Darling who have scoliosis and need to wear this brace thing to sleep?

— Yandere Nikolai, Alex, Farah, and Rudy with a GN! Darling, who has scoliosis

Warnings: Yandere behavior, details of surgery, back chronic pain, and PT.

A/N: I honestly hope you enjoy this, I did my best with my research! Please message me if anything is remotely incorrect. Happy holidays!

Edit: spelling mistakes is expected! I apologize.

Nikolai:

Nikolai has heard of scoliosis, though he doesn’t know the full extent of how extreme it can be. It can be fatal if left untreated, as he comes to understand in depth, and he really begins to frown at the times when he cannot help but rather play the waiting game.

Chronic back pain isn’t avoidable, which he finds out pretty quickly. Even lying down or walking causes you to be in some form of discomfort, and Nikolai hates coming to terms with it. He deeply tries to help you when he sees you in pain, offering to rub your tight muscles and placing a heating pad or cold press to let you sleep comfortably. Stroking your arms and waist, kissing you deeply, and rubbing your scalp to help calm your mind when it’s too much.

When heading to doctor appointments, Nikolai is always accompanying you. He understands it can be rather scary—the thought of doing more treatment or having a doctor being a prick and not believing you is incredibly nerve-wracking. But having him there, with his hand in yours and wearing his warm jacket, undoubtedly helps at times.

The corrective braces that you wear, he finds, are gorgeous, oddly enough. Despite how often you have to wear them and, at times, unsuccessfully working. Nikolai can’t help but admire how they just form your back intimately. He finds them breathtaking on you, and he never stops telling you that, whispering it in your ear each time he comes up behind you, his hands whisking around your hips to pull you closer to his form.

If correction surgery is ever needed, Nikolai will definitely feel defeated. He will sympathize with your exhaustion and most frustration. It’s something that was mostly avoided, but sometimes it’s needed. The recovery is difficult, and he’s worried about what it will do to you mentally. However, he’s there every step of the way, and if you decide to do it, he’s proud of you. In no way are you a burden, and having this surgery isn’t making you less of his spouse. He doesn’t mind caring for you—if anything, he prefers it. It allows him to understand your tolerances better and, at times, take over when you overexert yourself.

Alex Keller:

Though Alex knows and is aware of scoliosis, he doesn’t understand it as much as a whole. He understands the growing signs and the slight complications of it—but that’s mostly all. So, when you confide in him ahead of time, he’s a bit clueless. However, he does do some research on his own time to understand it better. And more importantly, how to care for and support you.

Chronic pain is something that he’s very aware of, but that doesn’t stop him from feeling awful. He loathes to see you in pain, and not just because he feels uncomfortable from it, but watching you grip your back, trying to relieve the pain but yet cry out, wants him to sob himself. It worries him deeply if the pain is too overboard, and he often talks to you about other options and if surgery is one.

Back braces suck. It’s one of the first few things he learned that’s dreadful about having your condition, but above all, he understands that they are more than a nuisance. His prosthetic is similar—it’s needed, quite annoying, but it’s there to support you.

Alex deeply sympathizes with the dreadful feeling when putting it on, so to help with your moodiness, he suggests decorating the brace. Adding stickers, making it a fun date night where the two of you draw and add symbols and all types of fabric adhesives to make you feel better. He’d even go as far as printing a picture of his face, adding you should make him a sticker and put it on, so he’s “always there for your back.”

His tight hugs and cuddles really make up for his long missions with Farah. Every time he’s home from them, his hands and arms are wrapped around you in some way—kissing your shoulders and making his way down to your back, highlighting how gorgeous you are to make you feel gorgeous.

Farah Karim:

Farah caught your condition pretty early on, understanding from watching you from afar, her “cat-like abilities” making connections. When she properly gets an answer from you, she quickly frets and worries herself by researching your symptoms and, moreover, how to support you as her sweet s/o.

In a way, she adores being attentive to you; your reliance on her is comforting to her. Despite her being a commander and being busy, you always come first. If everything is overwhelming with all the fatigue, migraines, and chronic pain, she’s right beside you. Anytime she’s at home, you can bet Farah will offer to rub your back, getting deep into your digits and letting you control where she rubs. She’ll bring pain prescriptions for easy access and come to you with homemade food she’s made, kissing your face and placing an ice or hot pack down your back brace. Hell, she’s even carried you to the couch or bathroom a few times, not minding one bit.

While she is away, your phone is often buzzing from her. She sends all types of things, especially random dogs she finds or pictures of flowers she comes across, the caption being, “Reminded me of you.” She regularly sends you funny voice clips or videos with her and Alex, without a doubt making you laugh.

Farah will definitely help you put on your back braces, tightening the straps when you struggle to do it yourself. To lighten the mood, as back braces suck, she’ll kiss your face, telling you lame jokes (she stole from Alex), and fixate on the two of you taking a walk together. But, if the pain does become too much, and the doctors do suggest surgery, she makes it your decision. She trusts you enough to make your own call, and if they persist, she shuts them up.

On days when self-consciousness and shame hit you harder, Farah will assure you over and over again that you’re stunning. In bed, she’s behind you, copying the curvatures of your back—her blunt nails following your arches like a painting because it is. It’s one of the many things that makes her have heart-eyes pupils whilst staring at you, just admiring you. She truly loves you and hates seeing you feel self-hating. To let you know you’re not alone, she’ll share her own insecurities.

Rodolfo “Rudy” Parra:

Rodolfo understands what scoliosis is—at least the top bare of it. He’s never known someone affected by it; therefore, he’s never had to learn nor properly research it. But, when you come into his life, he almost becomes a mother hen, studying the best treatments and systems for you, even going ahead to ask questions about your condition.

He constantly reminds you that your spine deformity shouldn’t limit you or stop you from doing what you want. It’s just a slightly bigger challenge, and he’s with you every step of the way, cheering you on in whatever hobby, goal, or career you want to succeed in. Your happiness is his happiness, so if you achieve something, he’s celebrating it with you.

Rodolfo is really on top of helping you stretch, doing some yoga with you, and helping you with your back braces. He has schedules set in the mornings and evenings to do together, and if you feel you are not up to it, he won’t push you, knowing you’re aware of what is best for your body. But sometimes, you have to push through the discomfort—and if he needs to push you to help you regain a bit of flexibility back, Rudy will do so gently, reminding you he’s right beside you the whole way.

Discomfort and being unable to move because of your own soreness leave him pinned. It’s not new for you, but it is for him—it’s uncomfortable and awkward, leaving him unsure how to properly help you. But sometimes, the best he can do is just be beside you. Helping you with items, hoping to have you get some type of joy out of snacks and rest beside you. Not having the expectancy of doing anything, just entangled limbs in bed as he traces your goosebumps, his lips pressing against your temple. He tells you what he and Alejandro did for duty that day, recounting some specific details and future plans by the two of you. Kissing your skin and reminding you that you’re his entire world.

Much like Alex above, Rodolfo heavily suggests decorating your back binder, making it more you-styled if you haven’t already done it. He understands they are bland and with no color; it doesn’t help your mood. So, he makes it a promise to help you decorate, adding some personal decorations, even if they end up bad. It’s the idea that comes in handy, and if the two of you laugh during it, it’s a start of something positive.

—

Masterlist || Reblogs, comments, and likes are very much appreciated!! Stay well!!

© yandere-kokeshi 2024 — Do not copy, modify, edit, repost, or use my works for ASMR readings, tiktoks, or other content.

[crimsondoesstuff]

OKAY SO HEAR ME OUT

HEAR ME OUT, CHAT.

Crossover idea between Mouthwashing and Five Nights at Freddy’s where the FNAF characters take over the places of the preexisting crew. The events go down the same, with some small changes in the scenes and dialogue to fit with the different character’s personalities and shit.

Not convinced? WELL I MADE ART TOO (this was the big project I mentioned in my last post)

BEHOLD! The crew of the Ursine!

I put a lot of love and thought into every little bit of this crossover. Things like the symbolism seen in the original game are referenced (the flowers symbolism, the board game, the attraction to cartoon animals /j), but there are also all new kinds of symbolism I threw in to really bring it all together. I’ll let you figure that out on your own, if you really want to.

(If you want a hint, the directions the characters are looking aren’t just stylistic.)

If you really wanna read more about my idea, I’ll be including more below the line. I just had to pitch this somewhere, I spent a week drawing this and I’ve already written parts of this that I could possibly post here or on AO3. Who knows.

HENRY EMILY, CAPTAIN.

Takes the place of Grant Curly.

The similarities between Jimmy and Curly / Henry and William’s dynamics was one of the main reasons I even got this idea in the first place. Specifically, listening to the song Brutus was when I really started to see the song as both Jimmy and William, and the rest devolved from there. I’ll go into more detail about that in William’s section.

Henry’s kindness, compassion, and dedication to his craft makes him the perfect candidate for captain of the Ursine. Problem is, he never knows when to stop. He’ll work himself until he passes out, only to wake up at his station and go right back to work. He’s on top of all of his responsibilities as captain, but with all the work on his plate, he doesn’t have as much time to handle the personal issues that seem to be arising among the crew.

Henry isn’t completely sure how he got to the level he’s at now, in all honesty. He was once a simple engineer on an older ship called the Tulpar, before being transferred and promoted to Second in Command. Fazbear Express said something about how he’s “good for morale” and “gets things done”, but they didn’t really account for Henry’s introverted personality. He’d rather hide out in the cockpit handling the controls, but that puts him back into a workaholic cycle that Charlie is working to break him out of. He’s lucky he has a daughter like her, and he’ll never stop saying it to anyone who will listen.

After the crash, Henry’s completely incapacitated. Not much else to say. He can do nothing but tremble and cry in pain, trying and trying to form coherent words and sentences, but it isn’t clear enough to the people around him. He feels more alone there on that medical bed than he has in his entire life. And he can do nothing but watch as everything falls apart.

WILLIAM AFTON, SECOND IN COMMAND.

Takes the place of Jimmy Zare.

Like I said before, I got really inspired to make this crossover by the song Brutus, but that was specifically the connection between Jimmy and William. I knew when I started making the ideas for this that the borderline obsession William has with Henry was a perfect fit here. Just utterly disgusting. I hate him. He should die.

William doesn’t have time to put up any sort of front like we see in the books. He has work to do on the ship, and he plans on getting it done as soon as possible with the highest efficiency possible. He wants to look good. He doesn’t care if he looks like an asshole while doing it. After all, he sees the rest of the crew as more of a burden on him than anything, obstacles dragging him back from reaching his full potential. From climbing to the top of his ladder. And yes, that includes his own children. He sees their presence on board the Ursine as a distraction.

Just like it’s suggested in the game, William and Henry were friends before the events of the story. Childhood friends who relied on each other through thick and thin. They both went into engineering, and William followed in Henry’s footsteps. But he was eager to get ahead, to pave the footsteps his old friend would walk in instead. It didn’t help that Henry always seemed better than him. Henry didn’t even want to become a captain, but there they were, running a god damn ship. William hated it. Hated them. It was so annoying how perfect he was all the damn time.

He doesn’t really care what happened to Henry in the crash. He didn’t make them run into the cockpit as the ship ran straight into an asteroid. That was their own stupid decision, and he had to clean up after their mess. Now that he was captain, just like he wanted, he planned on doing things right. Keeping the crew together. Despite the utterly hopeless situation at hand. It doesn’t help that emotions were never his strong suit.

CHARLOTTE “CHARLIE” EMILY, MEDICAL OFFICER.

Takes the place of Anya Musume.

I don’t know if I want to keep the more serious parts of the character’s story, but I think it’s too important to the plot as a whole to remove it. As someone who’s gone through a similar situation, it was a hard decision to make, but I have to respect the importance of a character’s trauma that makes them who they are.

Like Anya in the game, Charlie did make it to medical school, but never completed it. Her poor mental state combined with the overwhelming workload and the sheer number of years she’d have to be focused on nothing but schooling was too much, and she wasn’t getting the help she needed to keep up. So instead, she dropped out and sent an application to Fazbear Express where her father worked, getting accepted as a field nurse in training. Eventually, she was promoted to medical officer, but without a degree in nursing she was prevented from becoming chief.

Most of the shit she has to do on the Ursine is just scraped knees and the occasional dislocation, all of which she can handle with ease. She’s very confident in her work, and when she first started working on her father’s ship, she wasn’t afraid to show it. But something changed. Slowly, her demeanor shifted, and she lost that lively confidence that made her her. Nobody knew for sure what happened. At least, not at first.

After the crash, Charlie was absolutely distraught. She can barely look at her father when he’s in so much pain, and her job as a nurse is compromised by the rule of not treating family members. Since they have no other nurse or doctor on board, she’s left with the responsibility, but it’s debilitating. She often has panic attacks and break downs in the back corner of the medbay, hiding behind her desk where Henry and the other crew couldn’t see her.

MICHAEL “MIKE” AFTON, ENGINEER.

Takes the place of Swansea Hotard.

When I was deciding who to put in the other character’s places, I instantly thought of Michael and David (the crying child) and the tough love Swansea gives Daisuke in the game. I wanted to take that and make it so Michael is especially cruel to David to try and get the kid to quit. He doesn’t want David to work at this dead end job, stuck the rest of his life in this monotonous lifestyle with little to no time at home on Earth.

Mike is an incredibly hard worker, but he isn’t really sure why. He doesn’t like his job. He never wanted to be a mechanical engineer, and he never wanted to work for Fazbear Express. But when times got especially rough, his father showed up out of nowhere like some kind of stupid white knight and offered to teach Michael everything he knows. With William’s experience, Michael easily got a job with the company afterwards. But he feels indebted to his father for it, which- in the Afton household- is never a good feeling.

After the crash, Henry- who often acted as a sort of father figure for the younger members of the crew- was down for the count, and people were more afraid than ever. Nobody wanted to go to William, so they came to Michael, who tries his best to offer comfort (despite not being very good at it). This is especially true for Charlie, as she relies on him and goes to him to cry, since her father is in no state to worry about her as well as himself. Mike can’t help but feel overwhelmed by the sense of obligation put on his shoulders, but nonetheless, he keeps his head high and stands tall as an anchor for the group. Completely unwavering and stoic. Despite the pain he’s feeling as well.

Tensions between Michael and William are constantly high, and the two definitely don’t get along, just like Jimmy and Swansea in the game. And I can clearly imagine the pure hatred and rage in Michael’s eyes as he screams William’s name and chases him down with the axe. If I were to make this into a fanfic, I’d beat around the bush for most of the story, avoiding Michael calling William “dad” or “father”, at least until the part with Swansea’s/Michael’s monologue. Where he’d end it with the simple line, “Fuck you, dad.”

DAVID AFTON, INTERN ENGINEER.

Takes the place of Daisuke Juarez.

Funny enough, despite sharing the same role in the story- the new kid on the block, the intern who’s still getting his ropes- Daisuke and David couldn’t be any more different. David’s weaker, more timid, usually letting others speak for him and scrambling to hide when feeling in danger in any way. And we all know how Daisuke is. A free spirit with a gentle heart and a smile that can light up a room. Despite their apparent differences though, their stories end the same.

Unlike Daisuke, David’s mother didn’t believe he was a slacker. She thought he was too timid. She thought it would do him good if he put himself out there and got himself a job outside his comfort zone. She actually didn’t want him to get a job anywhere near his father (the two are divorced, and things didn’t end on good terms), but William practically stepped in and insisted that David work under his guidance at Fazbear Express. Ironically enough, William didn’t end up even being the person to train David, it was Michael instead.

After the crash, David didn’t know what to do. He wanted things to go back to normal, but he could barely keep himself from crying every time he passed by the infirmary and heard the captain’s cries of pain. He grows more clingy to Michael and his father as time passes on, rations grow slimmer, and painkillers run low. He’s scared, and he wants to keep the rest of the crew safe like his dad and his brother, but he feels too weak and pathetic to contribute anything.

Of course, David gets stronger throughout the story, and begins to believe in himself more thanks to Mike’s tough love teaching style. But it all leads to him getting manipulated into pushing his limits and going in over his head. We all know what happens in the vents.

FREDDY THE TEDDY, FAZBEAR EXPRESS’ MASCOT.

Takes the place of Polle the Pony.

You’d think there wasn’t much to the silly little mascot of the multibillion dollar industry behind the Ursine and its crew, but little Freddy the Teddy is a reminder of everything the crew stands for. Hard work, dedication, passion for the craft. Every poster around the Ursine reminds the crew that they are only a cog in the machine. And no matter what they do, they can’t escape unless Fazbear Express lets them go.

Luckily for them, Fazbear Express indeed let them go. Let everyone go. Just like that, everyone didn’t have a job. After their last shipment was over, that was it. Donezo. I sure hope that doesn’t cause any tension on board!

I’ll finish this off with a doodle I made to celebrate Henry’s birthday!! At least, my headcanon

I thought it was especially fitting, considering the impact of the captain’s birthday party on the crew. (More specifically the events that transpired and the news that was dumped on the crew with little to no warning. Imagine!!)

Thanks for reading this long ass post, I hope you all have a very happy holidays, merry whatever and all that

[itspileofgoodthings]

ALSO I am learning how to teach very introverted students, something my natural skillset as a teacher does not help me with.

[kacievvbbbb]

I can no longer read Batfamily fanfiction because I am a Jason stan and cannot balance my need for all the hurt between them to be acknowledged and tense and my need for zanny fun loving Wayne family content where they are all a big family and live in the same house.

But I’m glad it exists, that family deserves to be happy in some version of reality.

[dramarants]

Wanting more homoeroticism in the tension between the show’s leads as the narrative introduces greater intimacy and higher stakes between them, especially in a landscape that lacks queer representation who isn’t a villain or dies within one or two episodes, but also recognizing that core values/motivation for these characters lie in their relationships with one of two major female characters in an on screen sausage fest where the only other woman is a morally reprehensible femme fatale and erasing and/or vilifying female leads in favor of conventionally attractive males is a common practice observed in fandoms that’s rooted in misogyny and justified under the guise of rejecting heteronormativity, thinly veiled double standards, or claiming the woman is simply not interesting enough and not wanting to bolster that mindset

[m--bloop]

.

[charlotterenaissance]

having an almost comically bad couple days so i'm microdosing on all my fixations by alternating episodes of kids in the hall, night court, h2o just add water, and conan o'brien remotes. just having a normal one

[blujayonthewing]

desire to roleplay authentically when my character has traits that can come across as difficult or frustrating vs irl intense fear and terror of ever being difficult or frustrating FIGHT

[agayconcept]

.

[larry-hiatus]

.

[kidfoundonstreets]

i have so much hangouts its a little exhausting its fun dwdw just ahfh one finally screwed over another event (two times) in a clash and now i feel awful

[thewanderingace]

I just found a section on my new job's scheduling app (who knew such a thing existed!) where I can set my preferred availability!? They didn't tell me about that! So I set it up so I'm unavailable/prefer not to work every other weekend. Along with the Tuesdays and Thursdays I cannot work. This way I can pick up a shift those weekends if I want to but I could avoid working every single weekend AND it leaves my WWII reenactment weekends available and I'd only need to put in time off requests for the fridays before. I HOPE THIS WORKS AND THAT I DID IT RIGHT AND IT WON'T UPSET MY NEW BOSSES! I'm still gonna work weekends just hopefully every other one and not every single one.

[whimsyprinx]

I feel bad that so much of my issue rn is that I’m lonely because I feel like I’m putting a burden on others in admitting this, but like yeah I’m so lonely and I’m worse for it because like I can’t do much about it

[thepandalion]

I have a fic idea and I dont know if I want to write it or not send help

[featherymainffins]

Ough I fucking hate holidays because it is my duty as a child to visit my parents and just take whatever the fuck happens to me.

[nightmare8-420]

cw sh

its taking literally everything in me and then some to not fucking open a fucking vein or two. i just cant do this shit anymore. whats the point. whenever i think its getting better it just gets fucking worse.